Did you already break your New Year’s Resolutions — again?
Most of us feel just like that right about now – the end of January – same year, every year.
Do you remember the movie “Groundhog Day” where Bill Murray woke up every morning and it was Groundhog Day all over again? It feels like that for many people when they break their New Year’s Resolutions — again.
We all start January with the best of intentions –we’re going to lose weight this year! So we sign up for the gym!
January 1 – I’m too hung over. Gym tomorrow!
January 2 – It was really hard but I made it and got that workout in! Boy, that was tougher than I remembered.
January 3 – HOLY COW!! I’m REALLY sore!! I think I should have a “rest day”.
January 4 – G** d****it! I WILL go to the gym, but then Susie was feeling down about her breakup, so we went out drinking to drown our sorrows. I’m such a good friend.
January 5 – UGHHH. I am too hung over to go to the gym this morning – maybe I’ll take a walk at lunchtime, but it’s so danged cold outside!!
On an on it goes until, about 3 weeks into it, we just say F*** it and give up on our New Year’s Resolutions. We fall right back into our old patterns and maybe put on even more weight (or smoke more or drink more…. whatever your “I’m losing weight this year” sounds like for you …) you get the idea…
Did you know that you and I are in very good company!! We are part of the 92%!!
What’s the 92%, you ask? That would be the percentage of people who make New Years Resolutions and fail – again. Seriously, if not you, how many people do you know who resolved to quit smoking, quit drinking, lose weight, start exercising … whatever … have already given up?
The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry!
Why on earth do we keep on doing this to ourselves? Making the same New Year’s Resolutions Year after year after year…
There are just 2 main reasons why this happens.
First, very few of us are actually willing to take the steps necessary to create the change we keep telling ourselves we want. It’s not enough to WANT to make the change, we actually have to put effort into making it happen! If we actually commit to exercise, we’ve got to get to the gym or yoga studio or lace up our sneakers and get walking!
The other reason is even tougher: it’s all about mindset – that HAS to change! (and no one likes that, right?) Henry Ford said years ago “Whether you think you can or think you can’t, you’re right.” That all sounds well and good, but what about the sabotaging thoughts you aren’t even aware of?
Dr. Joe Dispenza, in his book “The Placebo Effect” says “the latest scientific research in psychology estimates that about 70% of our thoughts are negative and redundant…” 70% of our thoughts are negative and we’re thinking the same ones over and over again? And, we wonder why all of this seems to be so hard and we can’t figure out why we aren’t getting the results we want…
If we are thinking the same negative thoughts day in and day out, how do we think we are ever going to get free and create the life we want? I saw Marianne Williamson years ago in NYC and remember her saying, “we get up in the morning, start downing coffee, turn on our computers and the tv news, run to grab the newspaper (you do remember those, right? ;)) and wonder why we have a shitty day” (I’m paraphrasing here). It is SO TRUE!
I remember the scene in the movie “The Secret” where the woman got out of bed happy & glad and the rest of her day went well and then she did the opposite: stubbed her toe, got toothpaste all over her, a run in her pantyhose and her day just went downhill from there.
Think about how you start your day – any of that sound familiar? What do you think might happen if you started your day in a more mindful, conscious way? I sometimes have to force myself , because like all of us, it’s easy to fall back into old habits. I make sure that before my feet even hit the floor in the morning, I start with gratitude. “Thank you! Thank you!! Thank you!!!” and 3 things I am grateful for. (You can listen to the conversation I had with Joe Vitale about the incredible power of gratitude on my Power To Change Your Life podcast)
Gratitude Changes Everything
Gratitude is a beautiful low-risk, high-reward, high-energy practice that gives us more clear bandwidth to look objectively at things, just the way they are. It’s an easy (and often overlooked) place to start changing our thoughts and freeing our mind up enough so that we are ready to dig a bit deeper. The deeper work starts exposing the limiting beliefs that are hiding below the surface…. those thoughts we are not usually even aware of!
Many of those thoughts and beliefs were handed down from parents, teachers and other authority figures when we were very young and we just accepted them as the truth because that’s what kids do! Those thoughts and beliefs oftentimes look so innocent, but like a ball and chain, they can hold us back from our own truth for decades. And, it does take some purposeful, diligent digging to unearth them, heal them and finally release them! That process is unique to each person because everyone has their own distinctive set of beliefs!
Most people are very reluctant to do the deep work – either because they’ve had a bad experience with it before and believe that something similar will happen again (another belief) or they’ve heard about the painful experience one of their friends has had (another thought) and they don’t want to experience the same thing themselves.
Years ago, I went to a therapist to help me through a really painful time of personal crisis. Her approach basically re-traumatized me. It was after that experience I decided to learn a better way; a more holistic, gentle approach to this type of healing. Interesting how that painful time in my life provided such powerful learning and transformation for me and a new healing paradigm for my clients. Deep work does not need to hurt, be hard or take years … The gentle approach I prefer to use with my clients helps them quickly uncover, heal and reprogram those old worn-out patterns and beliefs so they can move forward in their lives – NO pain and suffering required!
Are you ready to experience freedom from the past and embrace what’s possible? Click here for a free 15 minute consultation.